The pain and the pride

It has been an emotional week, to say the least. Colleagues I have seen daily over the last nine years were victims of a staff reduction at The Gazette. When the news came out on Tuesday, I found it very hard to concentrate on the task at hand.

I felt pain and sorrow for my former co-workers. I felt anxiety not knowing what will happen with my and other co-worker's positions on the copy desk. I also felt some excitement because I could have a chance to be part of something revolutionary in this industry.

There have been plenty of blogs and stories written about The Gazette's reductions. Some have been venomous, some supportive and some at a point in-between.

I can only go on what I have witnessed. I can tell anybody reading that there was pain in Steve Buttry and Lyle Muller's faces when they gathered the newsroom for an impromptu meeting on Tuesday evening. If anybody thinks it was easy for them to send good, hard-working people on their way, think again. It wasn't and anybody in the room that night could see it.

Some have taken them to task for the cuts, using some pretty harsh rhetoric. They are both veterans of the business, willing and able to handle, and answer, any criticism that comes their way. They have faced their critics and responded.

Again, going on my experiences, both have been available and willing to speak with me throughout this process. They can't answer all the questions, but they have answered what they could. Steve held several meetings and had sent out numerous e-mails in an effort to keep us as up-to-date as he could. I appreciated the information and respected Steve for his willingness to tell us what he could. That hasn't always been the case with other editors.

Of course none of those updates could have prepared us for last Tuesday. That isn't the kind of information you put in an e-mail or talk about in a group setting. It's a rotten part of business, no matter what your job may be.

Gazette Communications has been called many things over the past five days. I have read with interest what the people have said, colleagues and naysayers alike. I've agreed with some and disagreed with some.

After all that has been said, I am still proud to be a part of this organization.

I was proud the day I was hired, I was proud during 9/11, I was proud doing sports pages each day, I was proud during the flood and I will remain proud whenever I walk out the door for the last time.